Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber.

Plato

Tell the cook of this restaurant with my compliments that these are the very worst sandwiches in the whole world, and that, when I ask for a watercress sandwich, I do not mean a loaf with a field in the middle of it.

Oscar Wilde

If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized.

Oscar Wilde

He is really not so ugly after all, provided, of course, that one shuts one's eyes, and does not look at him.

Oscar Wilde

If you pretend to be good, the world takes you very seriously. If you pretend to be bad, it doesn't. Such is the astounding stupidity of optimism.

Oscar Wilde

The typewriting machine, when played with expression, is no more annoying than the piano when played by a sister or near relation.

Oscar Wilde